Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Cheryl Burke and whiney bitches

Every season I hear ugly comments from fans when their precious little favorites don't make it into the finals. This season, it was very difficult for every viewer to see anyone eliminated during the semifinals because everyone is so talented. Sometimes the complaints are justified, but most of the time, they're not. I understand feeling emotionally connected to folks that inspire you, but there's no need to be ugly toward those you don't favor.

Perhaps the worst thing I hear from people are the complaints that Cheryl Burke is the show's favorite and always gets "the best contenders," and the "most popular" people. Out of the 13 seasons that Cheryl has been a part of DWTS, she has been in the finals six times, has won twice, come in second twice, and gotten third place once. We have yet to see where she will end up this season, but we do know she is in the finals.

Let's look at this critically. Before they were on DWTS, if you asked the average person walking down the street if they really thought Emmit Smith or Rob Kardashian would be great dancers do you think they'd say, "Yes?" There have also been plenty of seasons she didn't go to the finals. She was among some of the first folks eliminated when she danced with Wayne Newton and Tom DeLay. She's been everywhere between first and worst. What's the explanation for that?

People might say that Drew Lachey, her first partner, had an unfair advantage because he was previously in the boy band 98° and obviously had some dance training. That WOULD be a fair point if the same people weren't silent about the unfair advantages of former New Kids on the Block member Joey McIntyre, former 'N Sync member Joey Fatone, Spice Girl Melanie Brown, former 'N Sync member number two Lance Bass, pop star Mya, and Pussycat Doll Nichole Scherzinger.


Listen bitches, stop bein' bitches. That's all you're doing. You're mad that whichever guy you think is hot or whatever girl you think is charming is no longer around and instead of being a grownup and knowing that's just the way the cookie crumbles, you go around bringing everyone else down.

Do you have any idea how hideous you're being toward Cheryl Burke? She is an incredibly talented, creative woman whose artistic abilities are only outshined by her intuitive ability to hone in on her partners' strengths and weaknesses and use them to consistently create poetry in motion. The second you say, "She's only in the finals because everyone likes her partner," or, "She's the producers' favorite, so she always gets the best contestants," then you're taking a giant dump on all of her talents and achievements.

The only other pro I've heard such hateful comments made toward is Derek Hough who, out of nine seasons, has won three times and been in the finals once. Again, who the hell thought Ricki Lake would have turned out to be a great dancer? However, my hypothesis is that, since it's mostly women making these nasty comments, that they're not quite as nasty to him because he is quite the cute piece of ass, afterall.

Also, as I said before, don't you dare whine that it's a popularity contest. YOU are the ones who keep people like Melissa Gilbert on waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay longer than they deserve to be because you think her partner, Maksim Chmerkovskiy, is hot. How do I know? I'm on twitter. I see all your @maksimc tags about, "I am gonna stay up all night voting for you," and, "You're my favorite," and, "OMG you're so hot, I don't know what we're going to do if you don't make it to the next round," and, "Here's Maks' voting number. Start voting now!" All of this occurs hours before the show even airs. How could you possibly be voting for the dance that touched your heart when you haven't even seen any of them yet?!

(No, I don't dislike or have a problem with Maksim, but I follow all the DWTS pros and his fans are the ones I see doing this the most.)

Then I see how all of you cry, whine, gossip, and insult other people when you don't get your way. You've all made it beyond crystal clear that you're perfectly fine with the popularity contest so long as your favorite is still in it.


I can't think of a delicate way to put this, so I won't try. You're grown-ass women! Stop acting like kindergarteners. It's just a fucking TV show, you know the rules, and you're supposed to be voting for best overall dance, not who you wanna bang. Different pros and stars have different talents and different appeals. Different viewers all have different reasons for supporting who they support, even if they're the wrong reasons (like many of your reasons), you don't have control over it. You're perfectly willing and able to vote for Maks because he has a nice ass, but don't turn around and insult Cheryl Burke when people vote for William Levy because he also has a nice ass, or talk about how "unfair" the show is, or spit venom at people because you didn't get your way. It's not going to change the nature of the show. It's just going to change the level of respect people have for you. Pin It

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